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Sometimes You Only Need One Resolution - Harmony Harkema

Sometimes You Only Need One Resolution

Hello, friends. It’s been a while. I wanted to drop in and say Happy New Year, and to offer you something different in the midst of all the usual noise about goal-setting and losing 10 pounds and choosing a “word for the year” and new-but-not-really-new ways to get yourself organized and/or on the road to success.

See, God had only one thing to say to me when the subject of goal-setting came up between us this year, while I was worrying the idea in my mind like a tired dog with an old bone. How much weight was I going to try to lose? What new exercise routine was I going to try to find time for? How many blog posts was I going to commit to each week? What amount of fiction writing was I going to try to get done?  When was I going to start looking for a church again? How many books was I going to list in my annual Goodreads Reading Challenge? And on and on.

God said, “Don’t.”

Well, actually, He said, “Abide.”

Which I understood to mean, “Don’t.”

Because to “abide” means to “stay.” Not to move.

It took a while for that word, “abide,” to sink in, to wedge its way under the thick, unyielding skin of my ambitious, organized, goal-setting nature. I confess, I fought it at first. Because in my mind, I have to have goals.

Except I don’t.

Neither do you, in case you were wondering.

When I finally wrapped my mind and my spirit around the meaning of that word—that command—to abide, I found myself taking a deep, deep breath. A breath of relief. And something in me—something driven and striving and guilt-ridden—suddenly let go.

I went to my Bible and did a search for the word “abide.” I found John 15:4:

Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine; no more can ye, except ye abide in me. (KJV)

These are the words of Jesus. He’s telling his followers that if they want to carry out his legacy and lead others to the Lord, the most important thing, the one thing they have to do, is to stay connected to him.

That’s it. Stick close to Jesus.

Sounds simple enough, doesn’t it? The problem is, we tend to make it anything but simple.

Instead of abiding in Jesus, we look to our selves.

Instead of abiding in Jesus, we make lists and buy planners and read how-to books and join gyms and study up on SEO language and social media algorithms and go to conferences.

Instead of abiding in Jesus, we try to make it happen.

Friends, 2015 was a rough year. An exhausting year, to be honest. We moved to the Mid-South, a region of the country that felt all wrong at first. I took on expanded responsibilities at my job. I launched a new faith-based community blog. I gave birth to my second child.

I wouldn’t go back and change any of these things (well, I might not have voluntarily moved to Memphis, but that’s okay). All of them are wonderful and fulfilling and part of who I’m called to be and what I’m called to do—writing, editing, leadership, motherhood. But by the time my maternity leave rolled around in November, I was recognizing signs of burnout in myself.

So when He said to me, “Abide,” I knew He meant that I had to let go. No new goals. Nothing measurable.

This doesn’t mean I’m going to do nothing in 2016. I’m going to mother my girls and love on my husband. I’m going to go back to work and edit books and write and shepherd The Glorious Table. I’m going to try new recipes and read new books and move my body. I’m going to read Scripture and discuss it with friends.

But I’m not going to proscribe any of this. I’m not going to set myself a number of books to read or a number of pages to write or blog posts to publish. I’m not going to dream up anything new to add to my plate.

I’m going to just keep being. I’m going to abide. I’m going to let the Lord lead my life, day by day, hour by hour, instead of trying to make things happen based on the fact that I’ve set a bunch of goals I then feel compelled to meet by December 31.

Before I got married and had littles, I always took a bath (for relaxation, not hygiene) on Sunday night. I’d draw a tubful of steaming water, light a candle or two, get in and sink back against the enamel with a book in my hands. I’d stay that way until the skin on my toes was wrinkled and the water had cooled to tepid.

Last week, I took my first bath in over a year (for real—I hadn’t once dipped a toe in the lovely jacuzzi tub in our master bathroom here in Memphis—what a travesty). As I sat on the edge of the tub, running my hand under the hot water, I thought about how this simple fact was an indicator that I’d been striving too much, not pausing enough to relax and breathe, not asking God to make His plans for my life so I could just ride along. I dropped in a long-hoarded Lush bath bomb and watched it fizz into a layer of lavender-scented bubbles on the surface of the water and contemplated how abiding might be just what I need for the coming year.

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What about you? Are you busy setting goals for the sake of setting goals? Do you feel the urge to strive welling up inside you like it does every January, pushing you toward something(s) you maybe haven’t really prayed through, haven’t given the Lord room to move in? Have you been busy trying to lay out your life without Him?

Do you need to just abide this year? Do you need to let go of goal-setting and let God do the leading for a change?

I do. I am.

Blessings, friends, on your 2016.

Harmony

 

2 thoughts on “Sometimes You Only Need One Resolution

    • Author gravatar

      I think I may be in a million broken pieces on the floor. This is exactly what I needed to hear to finish what God started during my prayer time this morning. Thank you for writing this.

    • Author gravatar

      I find moderation so hard, so of course that’s where God wants me. Productivity is either all or nothing for me. “Abide” is so undefined, so scary. Which of course is part seeking him first. Thanks for this word!

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